A boy swallows a whole jar of coins, and is taken to a hospital. When the doctor came out to speak with the parents, he said, "No change yet."
Outside a dog a book is man's best friend. Inside a dog, it's hard to read.
A man needed major surgery. They removed all the organs on the left side of his body.
Now he is all right. :)
Q: Why did the farmer watch his lazy cows?
A: He liked to see the meat loaf.
Q: Why did the farmer feed sugar to his sick pig?
A: He wanted sugar-cured ham.
Q: How did Luke Skywalker know what Darth Vader gave him for Christmas?
A: He felt his presents.